Saturday, January 21, 2006
news just hit me today that my grandma is dying. very soon she'll be gone. all i'm left with now is a swirl of emotions within. i need an escape from the world & all its goings-on. funny how life is; only when death pops up do you fully realize how inconsequential and insignificant the pursuits we undertake are. but it's not only realization, you actually believe in the above-mentioned now. what an ecclesiastical vibe - meaningless, meaningless. everything is meaningless.
one voice in me says: let her go. Heaven is where she will find eternal peace, healing & rest.
the other voice whispers: but i don't want to.
my encouragement from Donne :
DEATH be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull, for, thou art not so,
For, those, whom thou think'st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poore death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleepe, which but thy pictures bee,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee doe goe,
Rest of their bones, and soules deliverie.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poyson, warre, and sicknesse dwell,
And poppie, or charmes can make us sleepe as well,
And better then thy stroake; why swell'st thou then;
One short sleepe past, wee wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
and my promise to You from "You Are" :
in the time of trouble, of this will I be sure- that I will bless the Lord forever.
illuminated. 12:29 AM
izzabelle/izzy/bel.